Hello . . . . My name is Melinda . . . . And I am a perfectionist.
I have always been a perfectionist, as far as I know.
I will always be one . . . to some degree.
I don’t do everything I want to do — because I’m afraid of failing. I just know people are going to look at them, criticize them, and somehow it will reflect in their feelings towards me.
I don’t open my mouth in conversations about things I am passionate about because I am afraid others will know more than me, and I’ll look like an idiot. Or they won’t agree with me, and I won’t know how to answer them. Or they will misjudge me in my weakness, and I won’t know to correct them.
I don’t sew because it takes so long to take out the material, put it together just right, etc. And then when I finally get it all in place, I really don’t like the way it looks. Those who know don’t ever like the material or pattern combinations I do, so I must be wrong. They must be right. I must not have “the eye” for it all. And I don’t want something ugly hanging on my wall . . . or sitting in my closet. I absolutely wouldn’t want to give it away to someone else who would have to put up with it. So I just don’t start it. Or I don’t finish it. And I don’t try again.
Can you relate? Even a little bit?
So now I call for a moment of silence for the destructive perfection walls that hold us back from learning, doing, trying, starting and finishing, gifting even our imperfections, cooking, baking, painting, reading, speaking, writing, and anything else we have ever wanted to do.
About a month ago, I had something happen in my family. And for some reason, it moved me upstairs to my box of stored-for-way-too-long-because-I-really-couldn’t-figure-out-what-I-wanted-to-do-with-it-and-certainly-didn’t-want-to-do-the-WRONG-thing-with-it fabric. I started pulling out scrap pieces, unfinished projects, things I had no idea how to do outside of my head (and no one who “knew best” had agreed with what I had inside my head). And I took out my husband’s sewing machine and my sewing scissors. And I Just. Started. Sewing. And cutting. And sewing some more. I didn’t stop to over-analyze. I didn’t stop to over-plan or even make sure I had what I needed. I just STARTED. And then I added to it. And then I added some more. I revisited the project, revisited my scraps, found just what I needed, and LOVE how it turned out!
And all the while I thought, “This is fun! Those lines do NOT match up! I don’t care! I’ll get it better on the next row. I am LEARNING!!! I am making things I have wanted to make for a long time. I will not stop living, trying new things, doing things that I obviously WANT to do (I mean, they have been sitting in my closet for over two years — or pinned on Pinterest — or stored in the back of the “someday I will” quadrant of my mind) but just haven’t because I want it to be perfect. All or nothing – no more! Not good enough – away with you! Overcritical voices – that’s YOUR problem!”
The longer I live, the more I realize that there will ALWAYS be someone better than me, smarter than me, thinner than me, taller than me, more skilled than me, more learned than me . . . . ALWAYS! The more you learn, the more you know how much you really DON’T KNOW. And that should only propel you to delve deeper, go farther, run faster.
And LOVE the EXPERIENCE! Because that means there are endless things to learn. Limitless places to explore. Numberless talents to develop. And an infinite number of people to meet and learn from. And that is PERFECTION!
Now, just for fun, I want to share with you my three next projects (with tutorials):
A Quilt (Note: I am not a quilter . . . yet!)
A Potato Bag (If you haven’t ever seen, used, or heard of these – they are a MUST!!! You can use them to cook – in the MICROWAVE – perfect potatoes, corn on the cob, sweet potatoes, squash, reheated frozen rolls and tortillas – SO MUCH!!!)
A Rice Pack (My mom made me something similar to this years ago, and it has SAVED me after each one of my pregnancies. We love rice bags, but the even distribution of rice in these bags makes them PERFECT for folding across your lap, across your back, around your neck, etc. My favorite one is also sewn/sectioned off horizontally, making three squares in each section – a 4×12 rice bag – instead of four rectangular sections – a 4×1 rice bag.)
This article was written by:
Jill Birth-Motivational Speaker and Weight Loss Success
Once upon a time, a school nurse told me that I was fat, weighing more than she herself did at 140 pounds. I was just eight years old. Thirty years later, a lifetime of weight loss struggles came to an end . . . FOREVER! With faith in God behind me and a Vision Board keeping my dreams alive in front of me, that little girl’s battle finally came to an end, and my entire life was TRANSFORMED! Now I’m living MY Happily Ever After . . . losing 131 pounds and 141 inches; gaining self-confidence and physical health to do things I had ALWAYS dreamed of; running a marathon, climbing mountains with my son, swimming, jumping, and riding bikes with my kids. LIVING the life I knew God intended me to live. And this is just the BEGINNING . . . .
I am a chips and salsa-loving small-town gal and mother to three AMAZING kids! I love “While You Were Sleeping” and am terrified of snakes. I am always up for a good movie, a good laugh-til-you-cry girls’ night, and a good adventure (especially if it involves traveling, running, or water)! Last year I won the Isagenix challenge for the most transformed body. I most recently was on the TLC Segment “Here’s to Your Health” striving to inspire women all over the world to have the courage to BE the person they have always wanted to be, the person God intends for them TO be.
You can find me on my website at www.jillbirth.com